My friend is pet sitting a cat (who wears a collar with a bell) and his socialization updates are killing me
Games with customization need to make it easier to sexualize male characters its not enough to have a shirtless option he needs a fat rack and body hair and more body fat and the shorts options need to define the ass cheeks and lets not forget the b[armored guards grab me and forcibly remove me from the stage]
Starting a new thread of insane shit I over hear my husband say to our toddler.
- “Here, will this rice cake cracker sate your dark passanger?”
2. “Come now my child.”
*bluey the album starts playing*
3. “Oh I am so sorry. You’ve been mildly inconvenienced. How dare I truly”
4. “It is she! Her Majesty, Queen of the Sludge, Keeper of Goo, DJ Baby P (In the House) Dropper of Beats and Clapper of Hands”
5. He is in charge of bathtime and he lifted the ghoul tonight while singing “come with me and you’ll be in a world of baby sanitation” and I laughed so hard I snorted pasta
6. Okay this is more one that he said to me about the toddler but he was home with her while I was at work and I just got this text
7.
“Happy Independence Day Sweetie! Nationalism is a cancer!”
8. This is another one he said to me about her but still it made me laugh so hard I nearly choked
9.
*Penny babbling in the back seat, many la la las coming from her car seat*
“Are you singing us a song? Ah yes the dulcet tones of goblin”
10.
“Listen kid, I can’t let you have the cup anymore because you keep chugging the bath water, so we just have to remove the cup from the equation.”
11.
*penny is screaming, trying to climb back up a big slide at the playground*
“Someday you’ll learn about ,I don’t know physics and the myth of Sisyphus ,and you’ll start making a lot of connections I think. “
12. *Pen is still screaming and baby cussing about not being able to climb back up the slide*
“The problem is that you set goals for yourself that are unattainable by both man and baby.”
13.
“You can keep the cookie container, I don’t care. What kind of father would I be if I tried to separate a small raccoon child from her trash!?”
14.
*Penny is crying because the bucket she insisted on sitting in fell off the couch with her in it. Husband is bouncing her and rubbing her back after assessing that no physical damage occurred, just a bruised toddler ego*
“Oh my poor sweet angel. She fucked around and found out.”
15.
16. “The only three things this child cares about is Elmo, Cooking Videos, and Keith Tryguy”.
17.
“Hey. No! Cup privileges hereby rescinded, bath chugger”
18.
we miss him a lot
19.
20.
“I just don’t know how you and I, the two most indoorsy people to ever exist, managed to give birth to I don’t know , Baby Bear Grylls!?”
21.
“Not that I ever would because I love her and she’s my best friend, but I’m pretty sure if we just gave her one of those old timey kerchiefs on a stick and like sent her into the woods, she’d be fine. She’d come home in a week with berries and woodland friends ready to go to war for her.”
I slept in and just woke up, so here's what I've been able to figure out while sipping coffee:
- Twitter has officially rebranded to X just a day or two after the move was announced.
- The official branding is that a tweet is now called "an X", for which there are too many jokes to make.
- The official account is still @twitter because someone else owns @X and they didn't reclaim the username first.
- The logo is 𝕏 which is the Unicode character Unicode U+1D54F so the logo cannot be copyrighted and it is highly likely that it cannot be protected as a trademark.
- Outside the visual logo, the trademark for the use of the name "X" in social media is held by Meta/Facebook, while the trademark for "X" in finance/commerce is owned by Microsoft.
- The rebranding has been stopped in Japan as the term "X Japan" is trademarked by the band X JAPAN.
- Elon had workers taking down the "Twitter" name from the side of the building. He did not have any permits to do this. The building owner called the cops who stopped the crew midway through so the sign just says "er".
- He still plans to call his streaming and media hosting branch of the company as "Xvideo". Nobody tell him.
This man wants you to give him control over all of your financial information.
not that i didn't want to believe you op, but i had to check that er thing out for myself, bc that just seemed too cartoonishly stupid to be real
but holy shit
Proud of you all for getting increasingly hotter as you get deeper into your 20s and 30s and beyond. That’s really cool and brave and so fun.
Tumblr staff: ten options is enough for polls, right? No one needs more than that on a regular basis.
The average tumblr user: Hey guys which element of the periodic table do you think is the most fuckable?
Posting hole
Lol
yeah yeah carbon nanotubes. but what about the copper nanotubes.
